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Archive for November 3rd, 2008

Today is nasty gray November.

The girls came home this morning with their Halloween pumpkins from their dad’s house. No, not real pumpkins, but those plastic ones…filled with candy.

I came home after taking them to school, unpacked from the weekend with J and cranked up the heat. 

And then I attacked.

“They don’t like Reeses or Snickers or Milk Duds,” I assured myself.

They like Twizzlers but hey, they don’t need 4 packages, do they?

Since November is here, what stays in the back of my mind is that in just a few weeks, J will be heading south for a few months for work. South as in, somewhere you have to go by plane or boat, somewhere warm all year round. I feel it every now and then sadness in his leaving. But his reassurance in coming back and staying true and flying me down to see him, has kept things in perspective.

My perspective on this is that a) it’s okay to miss him. If I didn’t, something is seriously wrong with me. b) it’s not okay to be sobbing every day or whine to him about going (not that it’s in my nature anyway) because first and foremost, I support who he is whole heartedly. I support what he does for a living. I also feel that despite this, he truly wants to be with me. It’s very easy. Because I feel the same from him and expect the same from him with my art, my life with the kids, my life here. And I want to be with him.

The fact that half of this work stint is over the holidays helps since I am working around the clock, have both girls’ birthdays AND the holidays. So it will fly by.

iChat will make a huge difference.

As will the week long trip down to see him the week after Christmas.

Last night we booked my flight, we got the price down after much investigation.

We now have verification that we won’t be going the entire few months without some time together in between.

But talk to me later about the time in between THAT!

Oooooh, I will miss the boy.

So now, I am sitting here with tea, and a plethora of candy bars and Damien Rice playing on the ipod, preparing for Thursday’s art show/sale, a dual event with a colleague and friend. Overlapping is an opening for another show the following week, which coincides with Blue’s birthday and taking down my show from last month. 

Today is gray skies. But December 27th, I’ll be heading to the tropics where the sky will be blue.

Until then, I suck in all the time we have together and remind myself that this is the best thing that has happened to me. And no matter what happens, it still is.

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